my life as is

Posts Tagged ‘baby_plans

Dear Zvichauya

Baby I have been pushing plans to have you for a while. First didn’t know whether I wanted you at all and now I now I want you. I can`t wait to have you, hold you, kiss you and watch you take your first of many firsts.

Now we need to make concrete plans of when we are to have you because I`m so ready for you emotionally but not so sure about financially and logistically as well. Moving away from home has clearly introduced some speed bumps but I surely do not regret waiting to have you. I needed to know myself first, discover whom I am and become stable and iron out all moving and settling in with your daddy before any baby drama. I`m so glad your daddy shared my view-point and I`m kinda sure he is ready for you. Its scary just thinking of having you the adjustments. I need to come up with a realistic budget initial and continuous. I strongly feel I need to go to Zim to have you before I never thought there were any good hospitals till I visited my neighbor she went to a pretty decent hospital here in Lagos and wasn’t as bad as Adojard hospital even Chitungwiza hospital is way a million times better than this so-called private hospital and would go to Zim also for the more practical reasons. I need someone to teach me how to take care of you. Ever since I read about SIDS I panicked. I`m so scared of it that I`m willing to go back to be cramped up in our old girls` bedroom just to make sure nothing happens to you. DH your daddy doesn’t think so but I`m hoping when he starts reading about baby staff he will know that there is so much to such a tiny being that we need all the help we can. Yes I thought about bringing people here but how many can fit into this tiny apartment. and I definitely need to create something like this for you.

Baby I still want to do my masters in the UK next year so maybe when I`m about to finish that I get pregnant that way will bring you goodies from the UK.  But if I keep on feeling the way I have been feeling of late you might come before masters 🙂 but I`m reasonable so definitely after masters. Which reminds me I need to apply for that.

What brought about this whole baby craving is that I`m planning a baby shower and have been looking for some ideas and what to get her and ohh man something just happens to my insides I carve for you. I know it will be hard work and I`m positive will be able to manage.

Good night my sweets.

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Busy bee

Posted on: May 10, 2010

I have been a busy bee and this blog has suffered a bit but will update you soonest. I do love the new client especially the times they are flexible. I get to run in the mornings thou ever since I came back from SA only ran yesterday for 10mins and today I worked out on my Wii for about 15mins or so.

I’m trying to change how I eat as being on a diet doesn’t work so I’m changing my lifestyle and what I eat to achieve and maintain my weight goal. I need to close at least 12kgs to be ok and 5 extra ones for my BMI to be in the normal range so roughly that’s about 20kgs over weight. 4 weeks ago I was obese and worked hard and lost abt 3kgs or so. So I know its achievable so I’m on my way.

I need to get rid of drink and biscuits in the house but DH suffers too because he wont have any snacks so i make him jelly and been meaning to buy malt issh its tastes like crap so definitely wont drink it. In Zambia I was so disciplined would take only a glass 3 times a day but now i just drink anyhow. I’m thing I’m happy about is my love for water im constantly drinking a glass of water every morning and evening during the day i have to remind myself to take it in. So as im approaching the big 3-0 im working towards a new matured disciplined me.

On the masters I have postponed it to definitely next year. Have realised that I would be rushing it and DH is not keen on having a baby reason being me. Baby your daddy thinks I wont be a great mother because I`m not patient with him so he thinks I wont be patient with you. His reasoning is not justifiable but I wont push it because I’m not ready for you just yet when I am I will get you. I want us to have a fabulous relationship and will do anything to get that so daddy is just talking anyhow. And as you get to know him you will realise he says things to get at people especially me since I’m not phased by much lol.

Sorry I have been MIA well not really but since I started this blog I had promised to write at least twice weekly just to keep things up to date. So Tuesday morning I don’t know where from but it just hit me that I should do my masters etc and I had always wanted to do my masters away from home take a year out and spend it in a different city. So my preferred choice is UK. Ok so not really a city but country but focus here on the different part. Could be anywhere in the UK.

I always felt that my siblings & younger cousins were more worldly ( as in exposed more) because they went to uni away from home and that’s why I always wanted to be away from home when I do my masters and all of my plans I always thought I would still be single by now. I never planned on getting married so early and if at all but guess what. I made God laugh by making my own plans which I had no control of.

Seriously if there is one thing I never planned for was marriage and my wedding day. My cousins already knew what she wanted for her wedding way before she met the guy. Guess she wanted it and always known that she will get married. Well better for her because she is/would have been prepared for it. For me it was just hard. Especially getting to this point where we are right now. People say the first year is the honeymoon year well not for me for me it was horror year. The fears of failing kept me trying and trying really hard and guess it’s paying off right now because I now more than confident that I made the best decision of my life and as each day passes I realise I am truly blessed.

Taku asked am I running away from DH and the answer to that is NO. If I had planned this last year the answer would have been hell yes. Yet today I totally want to do it to get out of the way so that I can totally be prepared for baby. Yes you read right baby. I turning the big 3-oooh sometime soon (lol) and would want a baby soon after that and I vowed to be better prepared for all the baby drama that will go on after that.

So right now the project I’m working on is looking for the best master’s course and college within my budget. I plan to start this year and I really hope I can work till it’s time for me to go the UK for the program.

What is scaring me is I will use up all my savings and will have nothing left. I really don’t want to go back to those years 2005/2006 when I never had money for anything I wanted. I know I will get past that stage but knowing I have 20grand usd in my bank account for anything I want is really comforting. Yep I have a DH but really I come on every girl needs a nest egg for spare of the moment shopping spree without restrictions lol


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To Do – Big & Small

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