my life as is

baby i`m so wanting you

Posted on: August 23, 2010

Dear Zvichauya

Baby I have been pushing plans to have you for a while. First didn’t know whether I wanted you at all and now I now I want you. I can`t wait to have you, hold you, kiss you and watch you take your first of many firsts.

Now we need to make concrete plans of when we are to have you because I`m so ready for you emotionally but not so sure about financially and logistically as well. Moving away from home has clearly introduced some speed bumps but I surely do not regret waiting to have you. I needed to know myself first, discover whom I am and become stable and iron out all moving and settling in with your daddy before any baby drama. I`m so glad your daddy shared my view-point and I`m kinda sure he is ready for you. Its scary just thinking of having you the adjustments. I need to come up with a realistic budget initial and continuous. I strongly feel I need to go to Zim to have you before I never thought there were any good hospitals till I visited my neighbor she went to a pretty decent hospital here in Lagos and wasn’t as bad as Adojard hospital even Chitungwiza hospital is way a million times better than this so-called private hospital and would go to Zim also for the more practical reasons. I need someone to teach me how to take care of you. Ever since I read about SIDS I panicked. I`m so scared of it that I`m willing to go back to be cramped up in our old girls` bedroom just to make sure nothing happens to you. DH your daddy doesn’t think so but I`m hoping when he starts reading about baby staff he will know that there is so much to such a tiny being that we need all the help we can. Yes I thought about bringing people here but how many can fit into this tiny apartment. and I definitely need to create something like this for you.

Baby I still want to do my masters in the UK next year so maybe when I`m about to finish that I get pregnant that way will bring you goodies from the UK.  But if I keep on feeling the way I have been feeling of late you might come before masters 🙂 but I`m reasonable so definitely after masters. Which reminds me I need to apply for that.

What brought about this whole baby craving is that I`m planning a baby shower and have been looking for some ideas and what to get her and ohh man something just happens to my insides I carve for you. I know it will be hard work and I`m positive will be able to manage.

Good night my sweets.


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